My Everyday Bliss: Birthday Card to my Love

His deep blue eyes that crinkled at the corners were the first things I noticed almost 22 years ago, his strong hands were the second, and his shy smile was the third. I didn't fall in love with him the first or even the second time we met, but I started realizing this was someone I could care deeply about when we saw each other after a week or so apart and he asked me how the Roman history test I'd been worried about had gone. I realized this was someone who really and truly listened and cared.

A few weeks later we went to a retreat with a bunch of friends and we only had eyes for each other. He took me out to a meadow and we lay on a blanket looking up at the stars and talking. We talked about our pasts, the future, and all the things that were right and wrong with the world. I felt myself sliding down a slippery slope toward that thing called love. I knew for sure I was in the deep end when I kidnapped him and took him to the zoo and realized that he was having as much fun as I was. Zoos have always been special places for me because my daddy took took me to the zoo several times a year and I could never imagine myself with someone who didn't love animals. I remember the exact moment that I fell in love: we were standing by the aviary at the St. Louis zoo and he put his arms around me and pulled me close. I felt so safe and protected that I didn't every want to leave his arms.

Music has always been a big part of John's world, but never something I really cared about until I met him and he introduced me to what heartfelt music was really like. I'll never forget the first time he popped a cassette tape into the stereo and played Sheriff's "When I'm With You" for me. I'd always thought that having a song was kind of hokey, but once he played that for me, I realized that hokey or not, it meant something.

We were married just a little over six months after we met and so many people told us that it wouldn't last, but we knew that it would. We knew that what we felt was real and that we would stand the test of time. I knew for sure it was going to last when he looked into my eyes and sang "Color My World." How could I resist someone looking at me with love in his eyes and singing:

As time goes on I realize

Just what you mean to me

And now, now that you're near

Promise your love

That I've waited to share

And dreams of our moments together

Color my world with hope of loving you

Eleven months after we were married, we welcomed Sean into the world and we made that transition from couple to family. John was always more ready to have kids than I was and I fell in love with him all over again when he'd smile the daddy smile at the thought of his son. My most treasured photo of my husband is one of him holding Sean in the hospital after he was born. The look of love and wonder in his eyes always makes me smile.

Although John was a little nervous about the prospect of being daddy to a little girl, he joyously welcomed Caitlin into the world two years later and he tackled the almost impossible task of being a stay at home dad to two small children on a military base. At the time, I had absolutely no clue what I had asked him to do or the depth of his sacrifice, but looking back I realize how incredibly hard it had to be for him to be a stay at home dad on the testosterone riddled space called Kadena Air Base.

We were more than ready to come home after three years overseas and John continued to be a very hands on dad. He made Cat's first birthday cake and did an incredible job creating a beautiful pink rabbit for her to enjoy. When she was five, he spent hours making a Blues Clues came for her to play with her friends. He was the one that took Sean to his first day of school and cheered Seano on at his T-ball games. He's been there for the kids through diapers and diplomas and he's shown them by example how to be a good person and a good dad.

Our lives together haven't been perfect and like any couple that's been together over twenty years, we've had our ups and downs. However, I know that deep down John is my best friend and my moving buddy. We've moved ourselves over 12 times and every time we've moved, he's been by my side to lift and tote and make sure everything got where it was supposed to go.

John was my rock when my daddy was sick and died two years ago and I fell even more deeply in love with him when he thought everyone had gone and he stood in front of my daddy's urn and thanked him for welcoming him into his family. I didn't realize until that very moment exactly how much it had meant to John that my dad welcomed him with loving arms into our family and it made me realize exactly how much my husband, who was adopted as a child, had envied my family. It also made me a little ashamed as I realized I'd always taken for granted the thing he wanted more than anything: unconditional love.

I almost lost my best friend three months ago when he had a heart attack and had to have emergency surgery. His voice mail rocked me to my very core as I heard the love and fear in his voice. I'm so fortunate that we've been given a second chance.

There are only two things left to say in this Birthday Card to my husband: